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  • Writer's picturePutt Toxey

Negotiating A Better Life

With Relationships

Plenty of successfully married couples will tell you, a marriage is more like a business contract instead of a personal commitment. The way this works is both parties agree to certain terms before they say I DO. After some time, some weeks, months, or years. The couple starts to go against their word. Now the relationship is all out of whack. To fix the situation, the two needs to sit down and renegotiate. When time goes by people either change or one might stay the same while one is trying to grow. A suggestion I have is to revisit what makes you guys happy and what annoys you now. Now that you know, you can begin to compromise. Let the negotiating begin, you explain what you need to make or keep you happy, then you state the things that bother you. If both parties agree that there is room for improvement hopefully the marriage will last for many more years.

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With A Job

The average low-income job requires no skill or degree. Most people make a living by trading their time for money. Now if you have a job that needed special training or skills, something that not everyone could do, there is room to negotiate for a higher position and increase in pay. When you come across this certain type of job you will not get a raise every six months or a year. The boss will not come to your workspace and say, “Hey I’m going to give you a raise.” What you would need to do is a bit of research on your part. Find out what your worth is. With you working there; did productivity improve? Is the company raking in more profit because of you? Is the business getting repeat customers because of the way you treated them? Did your average sales increase since you started at the job? If one or more of these things happen at your workplace then you can bring this to your managers or supervisor's attention when you demand what you want. Just do not make the mistake of having all these pros on your side and a few cons. Cons being a missing day (calling out) or coming to work late all the time.

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With Kids

Dealing with kids is extremely easy. Most children are not sure of their worth. When you negotiate with them, they usually settle for something quick and cheap. Children do not ever think about tomorrow only today. You want them to get good grades then promise them a phone or new sneakers. The part they do not realize as their parent you were going to get these things anyway. They need new sneakers maybe not the brand you were going to get them, that's where the negotiating begins. You want them to graduate high school and attend college? Promise them a car and watch their grades improve. Here is the real secret parents keep amongst themselves. A car is a small price to pay to get your kids out of the house lol. When we buy that car it's like pushing the baby bird out of the nest to fly. All kids want is attention and maybe the latest trend, whatever that may be today. Many parents spoil their children with all the things they did not have growing up. Instead of just giving children everything they want, try setting up a reward system where they earn everything they get. This way you are negotiating with them without them even knowing. Start today call the kids in the room and find out what they want and see how easy it is for you to get them to do the things you want them to do. You will thank me later.

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With Yourself

The first person you should practice negotiating with is yourself. Let us see if you can convince yourself to do things that will benefit you. You must make sure that it is a strong good negotiation. Let us start with the basics, do you trust yourself? Is this something that will improve your life if done? Is the task something you can commit to 100%? Are you setting unreasonable goals, how will you know if they are? For example, you feel you need to lose some weight, what do you say to yourself? I am fat want to lose weight, or I want to get healthy; maybe not. What might work is you are going to your high school reunion and you will see people you haven't seen in years. You want these people to believe you are still young healthy and everything in your life is going great. Another big thing, Summer is coming and you want to hit the beach with clothes off without people sharing or laughing at your body in a bad way. Now you tell yourself if you want to go to that beach party they have once a year with famous people you want to look your best. You want people to admire the cuts and tones of your body, not just notice the expensive swimwear you have on. Or it might be time for you to save or invest more money. You then will have to negotiate certain terms like, no longer hanging out cut back on useless spending. You still will have to reward yourself from time to time. Creating small goals and milestones will help with your negotiations. If all your negotiation even with yourself appear to be one-sided the negotiation will never happen. So today think about what you want and now think about what you are willing to give up for it and meet somewhere in the middle. That my friends is how you negotiate with yourself

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Negotiating with yourself

Today's call of action Do you need to negotiate anything is your life? Or do you feel your life is perfect just the way it is? please share a story or comment when you needed to negotiate.

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