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  • Writer's picturePutt Toxey

Questions I Would Like Answers For! (Part 1)

1. Why when some people get mad, they destroy their own personal belonging or hurt themselves?

The first topic we will discuss today always puzzled me. What makes people who are mad destroy their own stuff? I have a friend that got mad at his child's mother he went into the hallway of his building and punched through a glass panel on the staircase door. The glass had mesh wires mixed with metal. In doing this, his hand got severely cut. He had to run to the hospital with a towel wrapped on his hand. After two or three surgeries the doctors had to pull the skin back on his hand and stitched it up. Now he has no feeling in his hand the nerves are damaged for the rest of his life. How could hurting himself or damaging the door help in any way with his anger? Over the year I witness people getting mad with a person they are on the phone with and end up breaking their phone out of anger. One guy at my school got mad when his girlfriend broke up with him and threw a chair halfway across the room, of course, he was expelled from school. My friend put her daughter on punishment and send her to the room, she was so mad she pushed everything off her desk including your desktop computer. Not only was punishment extended but she now must sit in there without a computer to go online. Now, what sense does that make now she has to pay hundreds of dollars in damages. I have seen people kicking their cars if it breaks down now, they have two car bills instead of one. Could someone please tell me why people do these things to themselves?

2. Why when some people get cheated on, they go out and sleep with another person?

I find this next question to be senseless on people’s part in my opinion. When someone cheats on you, you get even with them by cheating back? How does that help your mental, physical, or relationship? The only way I think this could possibly make any sense if you already had planned to sleep with another person, and this was the excuse you were looking for. As for me, I will have two choices if someone cheats on me. I will either completely forgive them or leave that person alone. Sleeping (sharing myself) with another person to so-call get even will be disrespecting me more than the person who cheated on me. Plus, what am I supposed to do after, let them know I cheated as well? If I don’t tell them, how would it matter with what I did, is that where would the revenge part come in?

3. Why when people are broke, they spend the little bit of money they have left on things they don't need?

A person I knew lost a job a few years back. Instead of telling me how they were going to survive without an income, they were breaking down the plans for their last paycheck. I was thinking to myself and then what would you do? He was saying how he deserves to get some new clothes. Now that he wasn’t working, he going to Atlantic City and rent a room for the weekend. That is where the conversation stopped. You think that is bad wait until you hear about this. Today there's a thing called a payday loan. For those that don’t know what this is, you can borrow money a few days before you get paid. These loans come with a high interest rate; the money comes straight out of your check. So, what do you think happens when they get the money? They will spend it before they received it before payday. Now you must pay them back and now you need more money to survive until you get paid again next week. Meaning the cycle is never-ending. Another common thing that happens is people will take their last bit of money and spend it on things to make them feel better. The reason why they're feeling down is that they don't have any money. So instead of putting a little bit of money to the side, they go buy liquor, smoke, entertainment, and shopping. Now, these people become even more depressed now, you guess it because they no longer have any money left. You know what happens every time they receive a few dollars; yep spend it like it is burning a hole in their pocket. I know plenty of people living this lifestyle today and for the life of me, I can’t tell you why. Do You Know?

4. Why do some people hate how their parents raised them then turn around and do the same to their own children?

I hear people all the time talking about how messed up their childhood was. Most of the time it was having an absent father. Sometimes it’s a mom or dad working two to three jobs and never spending any time with them. 60% of these people now have their own children. They are rising their children like the way they were raised by their parents. The only difference is to them they have a good reason for the way they parent. I guess it never dawns on these people that maybe their parents had the same excuses. I heard the parent tell the children they didn’t have enough money to take them anyplace, what does that have to do with spending time? Or they must work two and three jobs just to put food on the table how much does food cost these days to have to work extra jobs to buy it? Another reason they must put the children in a great school, so they must work longer hours. The children don’t need the best school but they do need the parent’s time. What about when had to yell and beat them because that's the only way the kids will learn. That is what your parents did to you and look how well you turned out. Keeping up the tradition children should be seen and not heard, how will you ever know anything about your child if you never talk with them? Plus, all the time your parents limited you by saying things like, save money for a rainy day, get a good government job with a pension, stick with things you know and don’t take too many risks, traveling is dangerous, or telling you their idea of a real man or real woman does. You wonder why the cycle never breaks because we keep doing the same thing over and over, we know it's wrong or we know we didn't like it, but we'll do it any way we become the things we hate the most in life.

5. Why are people attracted to the ones that treat them so badly?

I've never had this issue or at least I can’t recall. When someone treated me bad I either checked them (asked them not to disrespect me). If that didn’t work, I moved away quickly and far as possible from that person. We all know or at least heard about a person of or in an abusive relationship. To the person not dealing with it say, I don't understand why they stick around. Meanwhile, the person in the relationship tries to explain how it's not as bad as other people think. Whether the relationship is with family, friends, boss, or co-worker. It is all the same when it comes to seeking approval from the abuser. It's not just only physical abuse some people are verbally and mentally abused. Neglect is considered a form of abuse. You ever see a pet owner that abuses a dog or cat, but the animal will still follow them around the house or won’t run away when they get the chance? Children seek love and attention from the parent that generally doesn't have any time for them. You see a small child sitting on the stoop waiting for dad to come to pick him/her up and then the phone rings and he can’t make it. Meanwhile, the mom is there willing to give them all attention they want but they want it from the dad that's not there. Another example the girlfriend is at home all day long and when the boyfriend or husband comes home, he's too tired to give her any attention but when he does have time, he runs out of the house to hang with the boys. She puts her life on hold break plans with her own family and friends hoping that he will give her attention. This happens more often than you think. The kids in school tend to hang with the bullies rather than just stay away from them. Even when a person is held hostage if they stay with the person long enough, they will bond with the person that abducted them. This is known as Stockholm syndrome. You are the one the sets the bar of how you want to be treated so if a person you bad, it is something you need to fix.

Today's Call Of Action, If You Have Any Answers Or An Experience Relating To Any Of These Questions Please Share With A Comment.

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