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  • Writer's picturePutt Toxey

So You Say She Is Just A Friend

How well do I know my female friends.


Have you ever been in a relationship that only you and the other person could understand the complexity of it? When you try to explain it to anyone, even your closest friends don't believe it. Mainly because maybe you guys were a couple now you hang with each other without sexual tension. Or when you meet an individual and you just know this person will make a great friend I was lucky enough to have a few women in my life like that.


For me the ones I was in a relationship with, I always said to myself she is a great woman I guest we are not great together. People grow apart, and there is nothing wrong with that. I feel the problem comes in when one or both people don't know how to let go. The same communication that could have save the relationship is the same one that would keep the friendship going. These few people that stayed in my life I truly love them. Each of them helped me mature and grow into the loving, generous, respectful, kind-hearted, good father that I am today. Besides my grandmother this group of women taught me how to love and respect other women. The other women I considered sisters felt like family when I first met them. It felt more like a cousin or sister that you have not seen in awhile than a person you are meeting for the first time. Sometimes you need to know how a women would think or react this is where these women come in with great advice. I had a lot of help understanding women over the years thanks to these 10 women in my life. These are the ones that the bond is unbreakable. If you don't have at least one you need to find one. I guess this will works for men that never had a real biological sister. The friendship goes for women as well find a male best friend...


I can't speak for anyone else but, as far as my friends go here are a few examples:

1.We call each other for advice on our current relationships

2. We still meet up every chance we get to hang out, which is not too often.

3. If we are ever in trouble of any kind, we would move heaven and earth to help.

4. No matter what time of day or night if they call I would always pick up.

5. My last will always be their first if they need it.

6. Things I wouldn't do for anyone else is never a problem when it comes to them.

7. I would protect them with my life if it ever comes to that.

8. My family adopted them as well as their families took me in too.

9. We respect each other for who we are, never asked to change.

10. We have been supportive of each other's dreams and goals for the past 15 years.

Here is a quick story about Sinatra and I.



When we got together it was brief, fun and different. We were young, not knowing how to communicate all we had, was great sex. Every adult knows no matter how great it is if there is no other foundation, the relationship was going to end. So we split up if you ask either of us why we could not give you an honest answer. A few years went by we reconnect not trying to get back together just missing the friendship. Oh, I think I should have mentioned that first, we were friends before lovers. I don't know if she was into me, in the beginning, I think she felt sorry for me thinking I was lonely that's how we got together. Enough of that let's stick to the topic at hand, where were we, oh yeah good friends. Years after we reconnected we started spending time together. Eventually one day she told me she coming to spend the night. It was cool and weird at the same time (she hate staying at anyone's house) by this time we were very close as friends. As soon as she got to my house she was ready to go to sleep it was still early. I told her if that's what you want to do; my house is your house my bed is your bed. She had ask me if It was possible to sleep naked next to me without me touching her. I laugh and said, " I had it already plenty of times I don't want you, now go to sleep". We both laughed talked about a few back in the days stories we shared together and she went right out. When we woke up she said to me "Thank you that's just what I needed." At the moment I can tell she was going thru something and needed to reset. I'm glad I was able to give her what she needed without her even asking for it. Then I made her a breakfast that she still talks about every time we are on the phone. I made her cheese eggs with cheese grits and bacon with toast. That was the night our bond was really put thru the test 17 years later we are still thick as thieves so to speak. I spoke with her yesterday who do you think gave me the idea for this blog!



Here is my list of women I was in a relationship with and are still cool today. (as friends only)

Donise my heart belongs to her first. (she taught me how communicate in relationships)

Sinatra she kept me grounded all of these years. (never sugar coated anything with me.)

Sheka she is who I call my number one. ( She shown me even separated you can still raise a King we made sure he never missed out on what a family looks like "His name is Dio")



Here is a list of my sister's I never been in a relationship with and we never crossed the line but the love was there from day one.

Latarsha (crazy as all out doors but I understand her fully)

Shashauni (Full of crap half the time but when you express you need her she will drop what she is doing or break her plans to be there for me 100% of the time)

Tash (I love hanging with her all the time, she is my go to for places I don't want to be she always makes my nights turn out amazing)

Schnedia (my little over protective sister goes 0-100 real quick she is my heart)

Cassandra (this is my younger sister for some reason she acts like she is older than me. lol she don't trust anyone.Not even this blog)

Tylena (anyone that know me knows who she is too me. this is my road dog for real we travel everywhere together the funniest part is we are both broke. we make a plan and find a way to make things happen. My best friend.)

Paula (the only sister that is older than me. always having heart felt talks with me when she is in town, she keeps me focus when I feel like quitting)


Without these ten women in my life. I wouldn't be here today writing this blog owning a company as dope as "WHAT TO DO ENTERTAINMENT".


Why do people listen to this fool,why do they keep buying his books and being misinformed about relationship?



My Ex women In order from left to right



My Sisters In order from left to right


If you have a best friend of the opposite sex shout them out and tell them how you feel about them on this week's blog

To all my friends let me know how you feel as well.

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